The truth is that you never get used to death. Loved one’s drop like flies and that never gets easier. You learn how to deal with it over time, but that doesn’t make it any less painful. You can wish your life away for someone to come back from the grave, but you will be wishing until you’re in the grave with them.
Despite losing so many wonderful people, I like to believe that I have become such a strong person because of the legacy that each of them left behind. I have also been blessed with people who don’t necessarily take their place, but who fill that empty space that was left in my life. Sort of like the glue that fills the cracks in me.
Through all of this I have learned a few things. First, death is sad and death is crippling. Losing someone you care so deeply for makes you never want to get out of bed. But you absolutely have to wake up each day and face the world because that is the only way for you to continue living your life as it was. Yes, you’re missing a huge piece from your life, but that’s okay. Second, just because someone you love is gone from the physical world does not mean they are gone from your heart and mind. You have memories and pictures and stories and thoughts all revolving around that person. That’s got to mean something, right? Third, there are always people who want to love you and help you. Maybe you lost of your major supports. That will teach you to trust others and learn that it’s okay to form new relationships.
I could talk forever about death because it seems to happen more than it should. I’m 20 and I can count, on one hand, the number of incredibly important people I have lost. I can count how many lives have been ripped from my gripping soul. It’s hard and it sucks (that’s what she said), but I’m alive and doing the best I can. I try to be positive, but when I feel like crying, I let myself feel that and I cry. It’s okay to be sad. But it’s also more than okay to be happy even after you have lost someone. It’s okay to move on with your life. It will always be okay.
i use the word fuck so excessively i sometimes forget it’s a swear word
if my life was a drink it would be room temperature coke with the ice melted
i dont chase after men but if he has tattoos and muscles a bitch just might power walk